My Grandmother's Thoughts Upon My 21st Birthday

My maternal grandmother was an immigrant. She, my grandfather, and their children immigrated to the United States in the early 1950s. Although they always made a big deal about their children assimilating (for example, their children were not allowed to speak in their native tongue on a regular basis, only when relatives from the old country came to visit), my grandmother resisted total assimilation. My grandfather was very proud of his very slight accent and total fluency in English. In contrast, my grandmother took a certain amount of joy in mixing English with the various other languages she spoke and assuming everyone understood her.

In our family, the longest running joke was my grandmother's habit of starting sentences or thoughts in English and finishing them in another language. We all got so used to it that we usually knew what she meant anyway. She also tended to start a sentence and not finish it, but move on to another topic as if nothing had happened. This occurred in both her oral and written speech or letters.

When the grandchildren got to be teenagers, every year on our birthdays, my grandmother would send us a card with one of her famous letters written on it. But these weren't everyday birthday cards. She kept all of the cards we sent her in our earlier years for Christmas, Easter, Mother's Day, etc. and would send them back to us with her letters added. I loved getting these cards.

One of her most memorable cards was written for my 21st birthday. Here is an excerpt from it:

Happy Birthday to you. Some of us are [at your aunt's house]; what's left of the anniversary celebration party. I came up to help with some artwork for [your aunt's] classroom. On Wednesday, I will go back home.

So now we are back to regular "normal" celebrations like yours and [your cousin's] birthdays. We assume you will spend your actual 21st at [college]. You probably celebrated at home before driving up. We hope your new school year will be profitable in all ways.

As you see I am using a recycled card. I don't know the age of the card. But according to the printing it must be from the elementary years. People are milling about here and throwing in some comments here and there. [Your aunt] is producing - on paper - seven Mustangs because that's the school's mascot. And [your cousin] and I are coloring. Tomorrow we are doing birds with nests and underwater schemes. [Your aunt] said that all horses are being without sex. Which reminds me (PEN CHANGES FROM PURPLE TO BLACK) Now it's Tuesday and we are dizzy with bulletin making. But mustangs and birds are done. We are on the finishing stretch of fish, crabs, seahorses, etc.

I know it's your 21st, so you should vote before you drink.

Love, Grandma

I never found out what she was reminded of when she thought about mustangs "being without sex." I was busy at college when I first got the letter, so I laughed and put it away, figuring I would always have time to ask her. I found the letter again a couple of years after she died and have always regretted I didn't have the chance to ask her what she was thinking.