When I was born, my maternal grandfather decided he would send each grandchild a birthday present equaling $1 for every year they had achieved. So, when I was 10 years old, he sent me a check for $10; when I was 21 years old, he sent me a check for $21, etc. Although I am his oldest grandchild, he did this for each of his 8 grandchildren.
This continued until I turned 30. When I turned 30, he decided to cap the birthday presents at $30. I think there were a combination of factors. First, it is probably hard to remember the ages of his grandchildren and make sure they all got the right amount. Second, he was a firm believer in adults being able to support themselves and probably thought that once you reached 30, you should not need more money from your family. (Of course, history in my family shows this is patently untrue - we're an educated lot, but not particularly savvy with money - but whatever . . . .) Third, I think he was worried about his own longevity and fairness. As the oldest grandchild, I was destined to benefit more from age-calibrated birthday gifts than my youngest cousin, who is 16 years younger than I am.
Most importantly, however, I think he began to worry about the amount of money he would be paying out in a year. The year I turned 30, his other grandchildren would have turned 27, 26, 23, 22, 19, 17, and 14. This equals $178 in birthday gifts. Now, my grandfather is not a poor man and has significant retirement savings. However, he also can be quite miserly when it comes to spending money on other people.
So, for six years, I received $30 every birthday. And then came this year . . . my 37th birthday was at the end of August. I got my card from him yesterday. The envelope contained my birthday card, the invitation to his 90th birthday party which is in October, and directions to his house from the Sea-Tac airport. No check.
Now, I don't expect my almost 90 year old grandfather to get me a birthday present. In fact, I know in his mind the lack of check is actually a compliment. He feels I am mature enough and able to support myself well and don't need his money. And, I'm pretty proud that my only surviving grandparent is able to remember my birthday, hand-write a birthday card, and throw a formal 90th birthday party. Believe me . . . two of my other grandparents made it past 90, but they wouldn't have been able to do any of that.
So, I guess the birthday gravy train stops at 37. I'll have to alert my cousins.
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5 comments:
That is really very sweet. Congratulations on reaching adulthood, PH!
Hopefully you will need those directions to get to the party! I do the birthday check thing with my kids. My son got his big one this year when I sent him his $40. He will get the same next year. My daughter got $28 this year so I have a ways to go with her. Sure is easier than shopping.
That wasn't Leah's post! I didn't change the account! Oops.
90? Wow! You should be glad you don't have to send HIM checks!
I took over for my youngest cousin when my grandmother died. She used to send us $2 or $5 in the mail for valentine's day, hallowe'en, all kinds of Hallmark holidays. Part of the fun was that once you were past, oh, 8, $2 was very little money, but it was just nice to get a card from grandma with your nice crisp dollars in it. I didn't want her to miss out on the memories and jokes we all had about the $2 gravy train.
But my cousin just thought I was lame and cheap, so I stopped.
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