I have this client who is not pleased with my representation of him. So, apparently, he has looked into hiring private counsel and has actually gotten a check to this new attorney. The new attorney called me today and informed me he might be taking over this client’s case. Here is the conversation:
Old Lawyer: Ms. PH, do you know I have been practicing law for 45 years?
Ms. PH: No . . . wow. (Why the hell do I care?)
Old Lawyer: Do you know what I say when people ask me how I represent my clients?
Ms. PH: No.
Old Lawyer: I ask them, "Who was the first defense attorney in the Bible?" Do you know who the first defense attorney was in the Bible, Ms. PH?
Ms. PH: Umm . . . no.
Old Lawyer: It was Abraham!! He defended the people against Sodom and Gomorrah!!
Ms. PH: Okay . . . .
Old Lawyer: So, that’s I how I represent my clients: V-I-G-O-R-O-U-S-L-Y!!
Ms. PH: Okay . . . well . . . thanks.
Old Lawyer: I think there’s a lesson to be learned in that, don’t you?
Ms. PH: Sure . . . bye-bye.
I suppose this might have had more meaning to me if: (1) I cared whether my client hired this guy; (2) I cared what this guy thought of me; and (3) I had ever read the Bible.
The lesson I learned? Hang up as soon as an old lawyer starts talking about the Bible. Jeez. Like I needed his critique on my legal abilities today. Have fun representing my client, Old Lawyer. He’s a real pain in the ass. You are perfect for each other.
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6 comments:
Hehehe, he is going to represent his clients as well as Abraham represented Sodom and Gomorrah?
First it was Lot, a nephew of Abraham, that was in the story of S&G not Abraham himself... I hope this guy is a better lawyer than he is a biblical scholar...
Anyway, our good "Lawyer Lot" failed to get any one of up to a hundred thousand people off the hook. All the people died as he was busy trying to lower the amount of "good people" he had to find. There is no evidence he did anything for the people other than this bartering attempt to reduce the work he had to do. I do not think that he even bothered to warn the people that they were about to die...
Even his own wife died and he rapes or was raped by his daughters... Depending on what version you read. Earlier in the story he had no hesitation about sending his daughters out to be raped by a mob.
If this guy wants to act like Lot, I sure do not want him anywhere near me let alone representing me.
Wow...I think I would have been thoroughly entertained...That is just a spectacular display of pompousness. (is that even a word?!?) :)
I am SO tempted to call up old lawyer and tell him that his Bible knowledge is flawed!
And follow up with, "HOW DO YOU LIKE THEM APPLES??"
Too bad I didn't write down his name.
Sorry for the white trash venacular here...but I failed to come up with a better word to describe this guy...so this guy is a total douchebag. Ok...wait...an ARROGANT, POMPOUS douchebag. There...thast dressed it up a bit!
Glad you were able to ignore his passive agressivity. I would not have been able to hold my tongue if he had called me, you are a classy chick.
Me...I'm just white trash who uses the word douchebag a lot. LOL
Hugs!
"Nothing in the world is more haughty than a man of moderate capacity when once raised to power..."
-Baron Wessenburg
Oh, Ms. PH, you'd have a hoot reading the Bible with me. But then, I focus on the dirty parts. :)
w-l-w,
Read Genesis 18:16-33 again. You'll find that you're mistaken. Abraham, not Lot, tried to intercede for Sodom, and succeeded in getting God to agree not to destroy the city if 10 righteous people were found there.
Nevertheless, that was a weird phone call for Old Lawyer to be making, and an even stranger analogy.
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