Let me start by saying that I believe anyone should be allowed to march in a parade and express their viewpoints in doing so. However, I object to certain methods used by certain groups for audiences that consist primarily of young children. Specifically, I object to the serious lack of judgment used by the Right to Life group who marched in the West Peoria Fourth of July Parade.
My kids and I were having a wonderful time watching the parade regulars - bands, clowns, politicians, fire engines, etc. I was keeping an eye on the upcoming marchers so I could be ready for a loud or scary one and anticipate my kids' reactions. I noticed the Right to Life group coming our way, which didn't bother me per se because I don't have to agree with them and I can ignore them. Also, my kids aren't old enough to understand what the group stands for and will only see them as another group giving out candy.
And then I saw them. The fetus balloons.
They were handing out balloons with a picture of a fetus on them. To children.
As the group made its way to us, I was struggling. I knew my daughter would notice the balloons and other children getting the balloons and she would want one, desperately. At this point in the parade, no one else had given out balloons. Should I let my kids have the balloons, despite my horror and disgust as to the picture on the balloons and the message it portrays? Should I deprive my children of a small bit joy because of my political beliefs?
The group drew closer and closer. I tried to tell myself, it's just a balloon and they don't understand what the picture is anyway. But I couldn't do it. I watched the parents ahead of me tie the fetus balloons around their kids' arms and strollers. I felt sick to my stomach. It wasn't just the message that bothered me. Perhaps if the balloons had just said, "Right to Life" on them, I would have allowed it.
It was the fetus that really bothered me. I wouldn't let my children carry around a picture of animal being harmed by cosmetics testing, as is often seen in PETA campaigns. I wouldn't let my children carry around a picture of the torture perpetrated at Abu Ghraib or a picture of a starving child dying of AIDS. I wouldn't give them those balloons (assuming someone would be crazy enough to make those balloons) even though I agree with the message some of those groups are sending.
Bottom line - I wouldn't let my children possess anything with a picture of a fetus on it, including balloons. It's just not appropriate for my one and two year olds to be carrying around a balloon with a fetus on it.
As the group came up to us, my daughter said, "Balloons! I want a balloon, Mama!" I said no. Predictably, she said, "But why?" I replied, "Because I don't like what is on those balloons. I don't agree with it." She seemed to accept that and was quickly distracted by the next group of marchers. My son didn't even notice the balloons.
But I remain resentful. Resentful that this group forced me into a possible conversation with my two year old daughter about abortion. As I said above, I do not mind if they want to march in a parade and hand out candy and carry their banners. They have a right to express their opinions, as do I. But they knew what they were doing by bringing balloons. Children love balloons - they are a symbol of young childhood - of joy and celebration. This group knew the effect the balloons would have on children.
They were not just expressing a message. They were forcing a message on parents and children because parents who don't share their beliefs will be forced into making the decision I had to make. And many parents with older children will be forced into a much longer conversation than I had to have. I can imagine that if my daughter were just a year or two older, she would have pursued the issue further, asking why I don't agree with them and what is on the balloons that I don't like and why I don't like it. And I don't believe it is appropriate to have that conversation with a three or four year old either.
Before the right-to-lifers jump all over me for this post, think about it. You wouldn't want me to give your children a balloon that said, "Pro Child, Pro Choice" on it, would you?
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17 comments:
No matter where you fall on this issue, what they did was in extremely bad taste and I fail to see how anyone could think otherwise.
I agree 100%.
I think I'm missing your point. What is objectionable about a picture of a fetus? In the womb pictures are kind of cool, in a scientific way. It wasn't an aborted fetus, was it? (that would be horrific) Was it a graphic picture?
Did the picture offend you because you knew of the message behind it? Or because of the blatant and inappropriate attempt to influence children at a freakin parade? I guess maybe if I had been at the parade and seen the pictures - I may have had the same reaction as you. But, if the picture wasn't graphic, and you don't make a big deal about it, I don't think the kids would care what is on the balloon. Its just a toy to them.
My objection is that the right-to-lifers were using young children generally, and my children specifically, to forward their political agenda,
It wasn't the picture itself (not a real fetus - a represenation) that was objectionable, it was how it was used. My kids don't care right now what was on the balloon, but slightly older kids would ask questions. I dare any parent to tell me they want to have a discussion about abortion with their four year old.
I'd be upset, too. Kinda like when folks protest outside clinics and have their kids in tow.
I see your point. God knows I don't want to talk about abortion with my 4 year old.
Also kinda like the Phelps clan draggin kids around to protest at funerals.
We'll go to a few parades this summer and fall -- hope we don't run into this righteous bunch.
A fetus is offensive? Isn't that what your kids were once? Sorry, don't get the leap there. And why wouldn't you just say to your children "it's a fetus" - And leave it at that. It's only a political statement if you make it that way.
I couldn't agree more.
I was forced into one of those conversations with my 12 year-old the other day when he saw a fetus picture on a Right to Life billboard.
I don't understand their reasoning. We want to save the babies, and then give them nightmares?
Smart plan. Keep up the good work.
Disclaimer: I have no opinion whatsoever on the abortion issue.
These radical batshit crazy weirdos really hurt their agenda more than helping. Isn't there something in the Bible they all thump mercilessly about not judging others? I think I remember something about it.
Christine's comment:
"We want to save the babies, and then give them nightmares?"
took the words right out of my mouth!
And on to another "right to choose" argument, what about my right to choose, when, where and how I wish to address the issue of abortion with my children? Tactics like this can force the issue at a time when the child is really not ready to learn about this issue.
I believe in freedom of speech and I guess this group has a *right* to pass out fetus balloons, but it is really shocking, inappropriate, that they did that. I guess it's the part about targeting kids to literally carry their message that bothers me. It it was a fetus on the hand sanitizer, handed only to the parents, who could choose to not take it, it would be different.
We were at the start of the parade and thankfully didn't see these balloons. Our son turns 5 next week and that picture would have gotten the conversation started. I'll have a right to life conversation with my kids at a better time. NOT at a parade because they want to use my kids to get me to talk about it. Things like this is what pushes people away from their organization. Kind of like peta.
I have strong views on some situations in our society that are considered "in the minority" and when you can't impress people with facts or logic ... you might be tempted to "Shock" them into understanding your view. It seldom works and usually shocks them into opposing you more than before. So I understand the attempt to stress their view but I deplore their lack of judgement, willpower, and decency.
Leave it to someone who disagrees witb you to leav an anonymous comment...oooh that just burns my arse...
If you have something to say...own up to it and say who you are, will ya???
not to mention that miss or mr anonymous' totally didn't get your point anyway...
UGH.
And...I'll just say it cause I'm bitchy today:
Pro lifers suck...
That is all.
Where to start? First, to paraphrase Anthony Lewis - freedom of speech; the freedom we love to hate. If we're going to insist on our own freedoms, we have to be willing not only to tolerate others in the exercise of their freedoms, but to exalt it. And not just grudgingly tolerate them; I always feel a tinge of excitement when I hear someone say something with which I heartily disagree. Call me crazy, but it validates my freedom as well as theirs. Second, I'm going to chide you just a little, but where have we encountered before the argument that I don't want you to exercise your rights in public because I don't want to have to talk to my kids about it? I say talk to your kids about it. You can be age appropriate in your talk, but don't begrudge these people in the exercise of their freedoms because your uncomfortable talking about it with your kids. Next, you grouped aborted fetuses with Abu Grahib torture victims and child AIDS victims. Did you mean to do this? Last, as to the pro-lifers exposing kids to their message, it appears as if the message went over their heads and landed squarely where it was intended.
Free speech can be free without being abusive. I have no respect whatever for people so cowardly they will hide behind children to try to force a message upon deaf ears. Evidently they have accepted their argument is ineffective unless they abuse children to get it across.
Michael, with all due respect, I disagree. Free speach isn't free unless someone finds it offensive or abusive. When my conservative friends would rant and rave about flag burners, desecrating the flag they fought for, I would do my best imitation of Robert Duvall in Apocolypse Now: "I love the smell of flags burning in the morning. It smells like - FREEDOM!"
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