Thursday, November 13, 2008

Dishwasher Dishwasher Dishwasher Dishwasher DISHWASHER!

After six months of dishpan hands, I finally have a new dishwasher. Or, I should say, newly installed dishwasher. The new dishwasher itself has actually been in my possession for six months. It's just been sitting in my garage because of the asshats who put the last dishwasher in my house.

Anyway, it's in and it works, even though it sticks out from the face of the cabinets by like four inches. (Ahh . . . such is the joy of an old house). Tonight, I'm going to wash EVERY SINGLE DISH in my house. I don't care if they are dirty or not. I'm going to do it because I can. And . . . I'm considering washing anything that will fit in the dishwasher tonight. I have really, really missed having a dishwasher.

Through all of this turmoil, I have learned that quite a few people either don't have or don't use dishwashers. I would like to know what is wrong with you people. Sure, I went through the apartment living too and didn't have a dishwasher in many an apartment. But I'm talking about people who own homes. When I was looking for a house, I told my realtor that my future house must have three things: (1) central air conditioning; (2) a gas stove; and (3) a dishwasher.

Even worse are the people who have dishwashers in their kitchens and don't use them. One of my good friends stores her cookies in the dishwasher. Like Oreos and Milanos. In the dishwasher. I find that very strange. Why would you not use the time saving device installed in your home?

My secretary has taken great joy in telling me that washing dishes by hand is good for me. It is not good for me. It makes me crabby. It gives me dry hands and I hate having dry hands. What I have saved in water costs, I have spent in hand lotion.

But you know what this means? It is time for another appliance to break. Bring it on.

15 comments:

Anonymous said...

Oh I am so jealous!! Can I come do my dishes at your house? I bought my house last year with the same instructions to the realtor for a dishwasher which it has but one of those small ones that fits about 3 plates in there? And I have 5 people in my house but I didn't care I used it anyway, until it broke last month. Which would be fine if you could actually find a small size dishwasher...but you can't , plus the asshats that owned my house before me (love that word BTW) had just installed brand new expensive cabinets to fit around thier freakishly small dishwasher!!! So I am stuck washing dishes, which means paper plates, paper cups, paper bowls...Ughhhh.

steenky bee said...

Wha? Storing things other than clean or dirty dishes in the dishwasher? I've never heard of such a thing. I did see a CITI ad where a girl used her kitchen to store her clothes, but I much prefer my cookies. Maybe I should store everything together so I could eat and get dressed at the same time. Save myself an extra step!

Mama T said...

Carrie bradshaw keeps shoes in hers.
LOL.

Sorry..I'm an addict.

:o)

Anonymous said...

You should have hired this guy instead of buying a product of capitalism:

http://www.pjstar.com/news/x1275807730/Dishwasher-sad-to-streak-of-3-decades-come-to-an-end

Anonymous said...

The handle broke on my old dishwasher and I haven't used it in about three months. I check what the new parts where going to be but I just haven't had the time to get them and fix it. Then last weekend I was in a big box store and saw a new dishwasher for $225 and I am thinking that is what I am going to get myself for Christmas, screw fixing the old one. That is if I don't get the unit from Netflix that lets me stream movies to my TV.

Tom

Anonymous said...

We have one in our house but I have the worst time getting my mom or grandma to use it! I DON'T UNDERSTAND?!?!?!?!

They insist that hand washing is faster and easier. uh?

Anonymous said...

Holy crap. My mom use to tell me that dishwashers never get dishes clean. So she never uses hers. I believed her. When we moved into this old money pit 9 years ago, it had a yellow crappy dishwasher that I used a few times and agreed with mom. Dishes just didn't get clean. Then we went all stainless and bought a shiny new dishwasher. And I don't care if the dishes come out with crusted poop on them, I hate handwashing now. And the only reason I would put my shoes in it is to wash them. Oh shit....gotta go! I just had a thought!! :)

Linda

Ms. PH said...

Ew, Linda. Your dishes come out of the dishwasher with crusted poop on them? Remind me to bring my own dishware while dining at your house!

Peoria Peepers said...

I am jealous, too.

We had an apartment with a dishwasher, so when we got our house with tiny kitchen sans dishwasher, we got a countertop one from ShopKo. It was great for the two of us.

It lasted about three years and then took a dump. We've been without ever since, and now I have my sights set on either a Fisher Paykel that replaces a couple of drawers of your cabinets, or a Briva that takes up one side of your kitchen sink. Too bad they're so damn expensive and we keep having other unexpected financial outflows.

I've about had it with handwashing, though.

Peoria Peepers said...

BTW, when I saw the title of this post, I had to read it. I think I held out hope that it was some sort of mantra you could repeat and a dishwasher would appear. Kind of like Beetlejuice, Beetlejuice, BEETLEJUICE!

Anonymous said...

I've never seen crusted-on poop, but even if I did I just don't care, so long as I don't have to handwash. : )~

Laura Petelle said...

We went without a dishwasher for several months and only narrowly avoided divorce.

Anonymous said...

You caught me, I will stop sneaking into your house late at night and shitting in your dishwasher.

Cameron said...

I'm in the minority, I don't have, nor have I ever had, a dishwasher. I don't get the whole pre-rinse, load, unload thing. I'd rather just do em and get em done in 10 minutes instead of an hour and a half. I know, such a loser. Wife keeps bugging me to get one, and I'm like, "Why, I do all the dishes anyway?" And she's like, "You ruined my life, I hate you." Why do you think she says that? ;)

Vanilla Bean Counter said...

The dishwasher in my apartment has been broken for 2 years. I don't use enough dishes to make it worth the hassle of trying to get management to fix it.